Monday, December 26, 2011

What is it all about?

It all started back on December 28th, 2009.  I weighed around 185 lbs and I did not like where I was going with my health.  Like many people, running a marathon was on my bucket list.....and like many people, I also hated running. 

It all started in a snow storm. I wore old sneakers, some warm up pants that were a tad too short, and a hoodie.  I didn't even cover 1 mile in that first 10 minutes.  Surprisingly, I was not discouraged.  I was not going to give up that easily, and as it turns out, I never would.  My motivation at the time was two-fold.

1) I thought I had something to prove.

2) I thought I needed to lose some weight. 

It's amazing how much you learn about yourself when you are suffering, and running can definitely make you suffer.  In those first few months I learned I had nothing to prove to others, and after my first half marathon, I learned I had nothing to prove to myself, either. 

I did, in fact, need to lose some weight.....

As my body started to slowly change, so did my reasons for putting one foot in front of the other.  I soon discovered I was running slowly over long distances to lose myself, and in turn, I was running hard to find myself.  Oh, the contrast.  The more I would get lost in my own head, the more I realized how interesting I could actually be.  The more I pushed my limits, the more I would surprise myself with what was inside.  The hard workouts taught me that pain is not an indication of ones physical or mental limits.  Ones limits lay much farther than this point.  To find my true potential, I had to learn to not only seek out pain, but to embrace it. 

So now I am on a journey of self discovery.  I want to find out how far I can push myself, both mentally and physically.  I want to find out how fast I can really go.  This is where our journey begins.....

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